This is, most likely, going to be the last email you will be receiving from me this year. Granted, no guarantees as the lust for writing is a fickle friend and she does have a tendency to visit when I need rest more than anything else, but for all intentions and purposes, this is it for 2020. This and more will return in the first week of January.
How the fuck can anyone even attempt to offer closure after this year. Of course, our inboxes are going to be flooded with hallow words about 2020, and I reckon by Boxing Day all of us are going to have allergic reactions to corporate sales pitches of “What a Year, here, treat yourself..” - capitalism rarely does throw positive curveballs. I do want to take this opportunity to share a few words with you, however, as there are plenty to be said and even more feelings of gratitude, forgiveness, sorrow, happiness and a few ideas for the future.
Let’s get a few words of thanks in regards to Black Lodges out of the way first. At the beginning of this pandemic I was in total panic mode for about two months. International shipping had halted, I couldn’t make product and I had a huge pile of orders sitting here that have just left here a few days ago. Aside from the fact that I at first glance had no source of income, no government support and the subsequent questions that these facts raised, sitting on everyone’s product that I couldn’t ship truly freaked me out. With that, a “thanks”, indescribable in its magnitude, goes out to everyone that remained patient. It would have meant the end of Black Lodges and thus me if you had not and with that, the continuation thereof is more down to you than me. For that I am incredibly grateful. Secondly, and after a little bit of financial stability appeared on the sky for me, we ended up raising a serious amount of money, more so than the previous year, for a number of mutual aid organizations, Doctors without Borders and so on. That part of BL is important and your continuing support of it all makes me so incredibly proud to able to do this with you. It continuously re-affirms my belief in US.
Then there is this newsletter - an experiment essentially to see if a move away from a toxic, destructive but hugely popular social media platform was not only feasible but could offer more than, both for my mental health and your enjoyment of what I can offer. I am utterly humbled at your acceptance, engagement and support of this idea because this really works. Not only do I feel immensely better for having reduced my time on social media significantly, but it has brought me back to writing outside of my academic world and I had greatly missed that. It brings me huge amounts of joy to write, share ideas and engage with such an interesting and rewarding community. This newsletter will only grow and there are plenty of new projects in and around this format shaping up for the new year. No, I am not starting a fucking podcast.
Now, let’s talk about Covid-19. It is going to take years for us individually and collectively try and asses what this year will have meant and will continue to mean for us. I still struggle putting it it all into context as there simply has been so much that has changed, materially, psychologically and perspectively. Fact is, we all have struggled and we will continue to struggle. Whilst change is inevitable and necessary, it’s usually not pain-free and this year has been painful on so many fronts all at the same time, that whatever coping mechanisms we have resorted to can’t even be seen, reflected and judged in a “normal” context. We have lost friends and family without being able to grief. We watched our governments facade of caretakers finally crumble before our eyes and continue to watch in disbelief at their brazen corruption and disdain for us. We have watched friends loose their jobs, go hungry and homeless, relationships break under the strain of introspection and isolation, we have lost friends that broke down and disappeared into the far fringes of populist extremism whilst Hollywood sing fucking “imagine” on youtube. Not to mention capitalism taken on it’s new form of authoritarian monopoly, both in terms of money but also violence.
Our society here in the global North West as we knew it isn’t collapsing - the word collapse only relates to those of us with most to loose - white, older men like myself - but it is finally being forced to change all the inherent wrongs that have built this insanely self-destructive way of life. That’s tough, and genuinely looks to be challenge of our generation and we are facing it. Of course there will be strive, of course there will be setbacks but if anything I believe that we can, because we are. Despite everything, I have learned more about myself, the world around me and the larger complexities at play than in the past 10 years. Yes I am exhausted, yes, there were days when I couldn’t cope but there were and will continue to be more days where the progressive clarity of thought will lead to positive, progressive action. I have nothing but faith and reason in what we can achieve, because we are starting once again see that only WE can save ourselves. A rebirth in solidarity and mutual aid is dawning, one that is finally embracing the true meaning of global inclusiveness of all, for us all.
There is a lot of work to be done and I am excited to be doing it. For now, take a breath, love your family and friends, be thankful and gather your strength. Thank you for being here, for allowing me in your life, supporting this idea and all of your kind words of encouragement, it is the fuel that allows me to do this.
Yours,
Steven.
“No, I am not starting a fucking podcast.” 😂
This year is ending in the same way it started, with immense indescribable heart ache and disbelief. The inferno that ate through southern Australia and now the ongoing pandemic with all its bells and whistles.
Stay safe and have a restful holiday season!